Mar 15, 2015

2nd hair cut

I had just finished bathing my little one, and drying her wild mass of curls, when I was struck with the irresistible urge to give her bangs. Her hair was forever in her eyes, and it seemed like a really good idea in that moment. So I whipped out my scissors, cut some bangs in one fell swoop, and looked on aghast at the minuscule and uneven fringe that started somewhere high up on her forehead. It was a flashback to those times in childhood when I would give my Barbie dolls a haircut, always with a frenzied kind of enthusiasm to start, (they were going to look SO GOOD!) and feeling utterly underwhelmed when my work was done.

I was surprised by how strongly I felt about her hair. I am not the kind of person who gets down about such things for myself. I wear tattered clothes and shoes from high school and college, and never EVER brush my hair. Superficial stuff is not my thing. Or at least, I've always believed that of myself, so it really took me aback that I would feel so badly over something like short bangs.

It made me think about how easy it is to get wrapped up in things that are on the outside-our weight (guilty), how much better dressed so and so is (or so and so's child is), the state of our home, or whether or not we are having a bad hair day. All of that has nothing to do with our souls and the particular magic that is the essence of who we are. I want my little girl to always know that none of that superficial fluff is who she is. Herein lies my work as her mother-to catch myself when I get caught up in the illusion, and to help instill in her a strong sense of self that has everything to do with who she is inside. That's where the good stuff is. We are all beautiful and dazzling souls; we just need to remind ourselves when we forget it.

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